There were some real crazies on the bus this past week.
Last Thursday, Ana and I were on one of the stretchy buses in the afternoon and a young guy, with what I thought sounded like an Albanian accent, got on at Elephant & Castle and sat across from her. We immediately thought he was drunk by the things he was saying but soon realized there was definitely something wrong with him. He was saying things like -
"I'm from fucking ALGERIA!!!"
"Nah, I'm from............fucking France MOTHAFUCKA!!!"
"I haven't seen my mother in ten years (shows photo of mother to everyone)"
"Tu-Pac is dead!!!!!!!!!!!!"
"I got no money, see? (Tears up American one dollar bill, shows what he claims to be Algerian money to us)"
"I hate Poland!"
"Next year, England (wipes hands clean)"
"My girlfriend is from fucking JAMAICA!"
Of all buses, the ticket inspector decided to get on ours and the guy hadn't paid. He was threatening to call the cops because the crazy guy kept cursing. Ana and I were in hysterics, literally with tears rolling down my face cause it was so funny. After he got off, he stood in the doorway and left us with some final words of wisdom -
"2003, 2004, 2005, 2006...I don't pay for TICKETS!!!!"
On Tuesday I was on the 214 in Camden and some woman was yelling at some guy saying that she was black too and she had a knife. That's all I heard but I kept my eye on her to make sure she didn't suddenly decide to stab me.
That same night in Brixton we got off the bus and walked past a guy who was yelling from outside the bus we'd just gotten off at the driver, saying he was the same height as him and that he was going to beat him up, all while banging on the bus with his fists. This guy was definitely drunk or on something. When the bus pulled away, he ran after it banging on the side as it drove...the bus consequently tripped the guy up, and basically ran over his foot with the back wheel. The guy fell right down and the ambulance came, I'm not sure what happened after.
By the way, none of these events took place on the night bus, although with the three neighborhoods I was in, I can see how this may have been normal.
Current Music: Spinto Band - So Kind, Stacy
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
5 comments:
Brixton, Camden and Elephant & Castle... it's hardly surprising!
By the way, "the stretchy buses" are actually known as Bendy Buses.
They even have a Wikipedia entry: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bendy_bus
They shot to fame in London when they were first introduced (and I quote from Wikipedia)...
"During late 2003/early 2004, a series of onboard fires on newly delivered Mercedes-Benz Citaros led to Londoners humorously nicknaming the vehicles Chariots of Fire. Mercedes-Benz quickly addressed the problem, although the vehicles were out of service for a period."
I know your job has just provided you with an apartment in Paris, but I really think you should quit and work for Wikipedia.
Also, I meant to tell you that I walked past your friend Kat and another guy from the pub crawl in Angel last week.
those incidents remind me of when we were on the q46 back in the high school days and that weird black lady was saying that the earth was going to open up and swallow us...or something...
That's what she said (because I couldn't stop laughing at her), but it was " open up and swallow us WHOLE!" I think we had to get of the bus by Our Lady of Snows so she wouldn't cast her spell on us.
Hhahahahaha!! I completely forgot that incident!! you got me laughing histericly at the office!! xxx
Post a Comment